The Silent Struggle of Women in Leadership

By Elva O’Conaire, BSc, MSc, Certified Health Coach

In my work as a health coach, I see a pattern that rarely gets talked about openly. Women who are competent, experienced, and deeply committed to their work reach senior positions only to find themselves in unexpectedly difficult workplace dynamics.

Often, the shift is subtle. A change in leadership. A different tone in conversations. Support that once felt steady becomes inconsistent or withdrawn. Over time, these women begin to feel excluded or undervalued in roles they have spent years building. While many hesitate to label the experience as bullying, the impact is real, they are left feeling unwelcome in environments they have contributed significantly to.

When Confidence Starts to Erode

One of the most damaging effects of these situations is the quiet erosion of confidence. Women who were once decisive, creative, and respected professionals begin to doubt themselves.

Am I the problem? Have I lost my edge? Did I do something wrong?

In many cases, the answer is no. What they are responding to is not personal failure, but a workplace culture that struggles to manage change, value experience, or offer appropriate support during periods of transition.

Why These Situations Arise

There is no single cause, but several themes appear consistently:

• Changes in leadership: New managers often feel pressure to assert authority or implement change quickly. When experience is viewed as resistance rather than an asset, long-standing team members can feel sidelined.

• Limited support and mentorship: Women are frequently expected to perform at a high level without the same level of guidance, advocacy, or feedback afforded to others.

• Chronic burnout: High-performing professionals often feel unable to acknowledge exhaustion. Instead, they continue to push through mounting pressure until their physical and emotional reserves are depleted.

The Cost of Ignoring the Human Element

High standards and accountability are essential in any organisation. However, when kindness and respect are missing, performance suffers. Experience becomes framed as a threat rather than a strength, and valuable talent is lost not because capability is lacking, but because people feel unsupported.

It is also worth remembering that many professionals are managing significant responsibilities beyond the workplace: parenting, caregiving, or personal health challenges. These realities do not diminish professionalism; they are part of being human.

Creating Healthier Workplaces

Workplaces function best when people feel respected and valued. Confidence grows when individuals receive clear communication, fair feedback, and genuine support. Motivation is sustained when effort and experience are recognised.

For women navigating these challenges, it is important to know this: feeling stressed, depleted, or unsure of yourself in these circumstances does not mean you are failing. Taking care of your health, physical, mental, and emotional is not a weakness. It is a necessary response to prolonged pressure.

And for leaders and organisations, the message is equally clear. Cultures built on respect, clarity, and humanity do more than retain talent, they allow people to do their best work.

If this resonates with your experience, it’s worth knowing that this response is understandable and it says more about the environment than your capability.

Leading with consideration and integrity benefits everyone involved and it is something our workplaces urgently need more of.